some days

I had a job interview this morning. It went okay, I guess, but I'm not the greatest at job interviews and I didn't feel like I presented myself as well as I could have. And then I walked around town in the rain and was hungry and a little bit mopey but didn't feel like getting food from anywhere. Almost home, I stepped in dog poo (while wearing my good shoes) in front of the house that I hate walking past because its squalor seems to be crawling across the yard towards everything. Sigh. Some days, shit just happens like this. At home I made two pieces of toast and ate them with butter and squares of dark chocolate on top like they do in France (err, like I did in France, anyway). That helped. And I made coffee, though perhaps I shouldn't have because it felt like my heart rate picked up before I was even through grinding the beans. Then came the question of cleaning the house. Why bother cleaning the house when I could relax and read and maybe paint something? But I like being in the house better when it's clean, and someone has to do it. Remember when the Cat in the Hat eats cake in the bath and leaves a cat ring all around it? This is what I think about when scrubbing our tub. One of our cats likes to hang out in the tub and lap up the small puddles left from showers, but I don't think I can blame her. There were good points too. There always are. Two Anna's hummingbirds were serenading the world when I passed by. They perched in shrubs by the water, their tiny beaks buzzing and chirping sweetly and their faces iridescent fuchsia when caught by the light. At the water's edge, clumps and drifts of ducks placidly stirred - American wigeons and mergansers - and black oystercatchers and various gulls comically prowled the shore.

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good things prevail

The sun came out during my walk home today. Blue sky appeared and gulls wheeled across it like slices of cloud. From an ornate old upstairs window came the sound of someone practicing a clarinet. What looked like a sale price of $29.99 turned into $10.99 when I got to the till. J picked me up along the way and we went and bought two pairs of awesome old binoculars for ten dollars. I opted to walk the 7.7 km home rather than spend money on the bus or face stalling downtown in traffic again. I got my patient, wonderful partner out of bed by 4:30 this morning so he could come to work with me and bring the car home. Between his calming presence and the lack of traffic at this predawn hour, the drive went perfectly.

It's so nice when good things prevail. This morning around five, my body did not appreciate being at work. Bed is at its finest between one and six in the morning, and I think my subconscious may have been trying to help me out by getting my body to play sick. Suddenly nausea, a sore back, brain will not compute... but I'm the only one there at that hour and the baking must get done somehow so it isn't especially useful. It's also hard to tell how one ought to be feeling at that hour after another restless night of sleep (I don't sleep well anticipating that early alarm). When I left work, the people I walked past looked like versions of my own worn-out state - anxious, drawn faces and tired eyes. I tried to smile at them. On boulevards and in gardens beside the sidewalk, green shoots coming up already. And then, the arrival of the aforementioned sun...

I've been putting out feelers for new work in Victoria, and am cultivating my resume, hope, and some intro emails.

Right now the rabbits are on a blanket in the living room with me. Seven, my delicate black bunny who named herself by jumping on J's keyboard and googling "7", has been all over my computer. She somehow enabled code in this post, which I turned off because I haven't learned it, and here is what else she had to say:



For all I know, she might be a very mathematically advanced rabbit. Now Zephyr is skittering around the kitchen, her furred feet sliding out on the old linoleum. The dishes are taking over in there, but I feel okay getting to them later, knowing that I looked at job postings and tweaked my resume this afternoon. Tomorrow is my Friday, then there will be a clean house and birthday celebrations for J. Things are looking up.

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